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The Hitman’s Bodyguard Review (2017) | An Act of Deliberate Plotting

The Hitman’s Bodyguard is as weird, absurd and fun as it sounds by the very title of it. Doesn’t that give away a bit of a plot as well? So, we already knew the nub of the tale even before walking into the theatre. Of course, oblivious to how much comedy the movie was going to pack in. The good news is that the movie is exactly what it promises to deliver by that moniker. The bad news is that there is nothing serious going on in here, so even if you try your best to find something somber, trust me, it isn’t. It is written in all good fun, and I guess, supposed to be enjoyed like that.

The Hitman’s Bodyguard is solely driven with “seat belts” on by Samuel L. Jackson. Even though you feel like the movie’s title is about the bodyguard Ryan Reynolds and not the hitman himself, you are dead wrong. Ryan is just an uptight rabbit, no matter how good he is on the field, he forever stays below the real deal Samuel L. Motherfucking Jackson.

Oh, by the way, there’s probably no one in the world who says “Motherfucker” better than this guy. And that somehow makes his dialogues enjoyable. I think he writes over his screenplay.

This guy single-handedly ruined the word motherfucker.

Plot and Direction of The Hitman’s Bodyguard (Spoilers)

As mentioned earlier The Hitman’s Bodyguard isn’t keen on showing you genuine action. The action is wrapped in comedy and so if you think there is a serious scene about to come, be wary it has just been shot for cheap thrills. Not to give you any unadulterated adrenaline rush.

The character of Samuel L. Jackson, Darius Kincaid, being the real hero of the flick, does smug things, acts as if he is the boss, and keeps condescending the bodyguard Michael Bryce (Ryan Reynolds) who is asked to save his ass.

still from The Hitman's Bodyguard

It almost seems like the concept was imagined first, and then a story was written all around it. Like why would a Hitman require a bodyguard in the first place? Unless he’s injured, right? Let’s injure him. And why would the bodyguard be protecting him? Unless he has been hired or forced to, of course. For our hitman to be badass it would be too beneath him to call for help, so let someone else do that. So there’s a woman Amelia Roussel played by Elodie Yung. Since it’s a bodyguard protecting the Hitman, he has to be the best, or there’s really no point. Let’s make him the best! And thus the agency AAA came into existence.

Catch my drift?

The movie is directed by Patrick Hughes. The story is written by Tom O’ Connor.

The Chemistry

The Hitman’s Bodyguard is all about the chemistry between its two lead actors. With that flaky storyline, it had to be. Surprisingly that’s really good.

Darius Kincaid: I will bust a cap in your ass.
Michael Bryce: Have you ever said “please”?
Darius Kincaid: Please, motherfucker!

Ryan Reynolds the deuteragonist plays the uptight guy keen on fulfilling his mission while Jackson is just relentless playing a guy full of himself.  Their trivial conversation about “how to do a thing” is pretty interesting, and most of the comedy is derived from that very equation. You have Michael Bryce trying to ensure that a certain way is followed for safety reasons, but Darius does the exact opposite being a guy who enjoys living on the edge.

Darius: I made that jump on one leg.
Michael: I made that jump without jumping.

There are plenty of laughs strewn across the movie. Some of them really enjoyable, others fail to tickle you. The great comic timing of Ryan comes into play more than often, and you realize the casting was done great with that pissed off face he makes.

still from The Hitman's Bodyguard movie

Salma Hayek brings more fun to the table by playing Darius’ wife. She is boisterous and equally high on expletives. Love how she calls Darius an unkillable Cucaracha.

Wasting Gary Oldman

When the villain isn’t as dangerous as he looks, it becomes a concern for a movie. Gary Oldman was roped in to play Vladislav Dukhovich the main antagonist in the movie who is calling the shots to stop Darius from reaching the court. Unfortunately, even though he has been provided with some great lines, and an accent to ace that, there is nothing he could do with a story-line that places him as an insignificant person against Darius. He ends up disappearing in a jiffy.

You fucked up when you shot my bodyguard.

All that talent goes to waste when you don’t use him enough. At least should have let him do something outrageous or contemptuous. He didn’t even reek of perversion. The flick ends up becoming all about his minions who come try to kill the couple.

Even there, the level of action is moderate. The energy, however, stays great and the stunts are performed effectively. The most stretched scene is that of Darius trying to escape on a motor boat while Bryce guards him using a bike. Then there are some cool car chases, bullets flying all around, close encounters and fist fights that end up making the movie worth watching.

You can order the movie from here:

The Final Verdict

The Hitman’s Bodyguard is average if not great. But it is entertaining nevertheless. Even if the plot just sounds like nothing but a road trip movie for its characters, the real fun happens when these two get to talking.

Go and watch it for yourself to enjoy its sweet nothings.

Check out reviews of other Ryan Reynolds movies.

Check out the trailer of The Hitman’s Bodyguard here:

Life Movie Review (2017) | A Spine-Tingling Sci-Fi Thriller

Life movie is yet another critical speculation of alien life form if we were to encounter one whilst prodding into the unknown. Even though the movie sends the message loud and clear that while trying to scour through uncharted enclaves, we might be endangering our whole planet in the process, what it also does is create a thrilling environment to execute its brilliant horror. If you focus on the thrilling formidable part alone you are going to simply love it. It’s climax has a badass twist which is definitely going to leave you satisfied.

While there are a lot of movies out there on a similar theme, and the concept is somehow trying to steer us towards not messing with things we don’t fathom, Life movie still remains however an edgy intriguing take on the extraterrestrial.

Theme and Plot of Life Movie

What happens when you try to understand the unexplained? The possibilities are immense when you really look at it. But that’s when you are optimistic about things. What if things begin to go south? What happens then? That’s the primal theme of the Life movie on which you find it riveted.

A six member ISS team is able to successfully capture a soil sample from Mars. Subjecting the specimen, segregating a single-celled organism from it, Hugh Derry played by Ariyon Bakare is able to bring it to life by adjusting it to an artificial atmosphere. They find it turning into a multi-celled organism pretty quick and that it reacts pretty well to stimuli. Each cell has a myocyte, neuron and photoreceptor of its own. Owing to that it’s dubbed to be all muscle, all brain, all eye. The organism is named Calvin after a school’s name.

still of baby calvin in life movie

One day due to a lab accident Calvin becomes dormant. On instigation for the fear of losing it, with the help of mild electric shock, Calvin becomes hostile and animatedly attacks Hugh. It is able to escape the cube, disintegrates a lab rat within a matter of seconds, and grows in size. When Rory Adams played by Ryan Reynolds tries to save Hugh, Calvin grabs hold of him too and despite him trying to kill it with an incinerator, it enters his mouth killing him slowly from the inside.

Following that incident Calvin escapes via a vent. What follows is sheer madness with the crew trying to fend off an omnipotent alien who is bent on killing everything it finds on board just for survival. What’s worse is the size of it keeps growing, and it’s impossible to kill.

You can order Life Movie from here:

The Metaphor of Life

Even though the concept herein is supposed to be a tad glib, you can’t help but connect it with the bigger picture. What if “we” humans are nothing but parasites like Calvin? What if we were inevitable too? All the animals, birds and plants extant today were trying its best to fend off humans, but we stuck, glued in like Calvin for survival. And we obliterated all signs of life, because all we cared for was survival.

I mean just look at it, we came along on a meteor annihilating the entire species of dinosaurs completely. We were also a result of single-celled organism that turned into variants of multi-celled ones. We swallowed the good, took everything by force and rule the planet like the next dinosaurs. In a way we are nothing but a paragon of Calvin.

Screenplay and Direction

Screenplay of Life movie is extremely poignant. At times when people stop to reflect, that’s when you come across some of the most powerful lines the movie has. At one point David Jordan played by Jake Gyllenhaal narrates an excerpt from “Goodnight Moon” by Margaret Wise Brown and it spirals you into infinity thinking.

Goodnight room. Goodnight moon. Goodnight cow jumping over the moon. Goodnight light. And the red balloon. Goodnight nobody.

Daniel Espinosa has directed the flick beautifully. I loved how there were long continuous shots of camera wherein the man behind the lens floated alongside its characters. People who went out were often shown from the vantage of people watching from the inside which was a subtle take.

There are however moments wherein it becomes really hard to concentrate because of all the red lights, you don’t know what’s going on or where’s our predator hiding. Also, actors are closely shot which populates the entire screen with their face. I think in the entire flick there wasn’t a single shot showing any actor properly which kind of made things monotonous with the camera.

The end somehow becomes predictable when you realize what is going to happen. It could have been wrapped more under clouds of doubt so that the audiences couldn’t have possibly seen anything coming.

The Final Verdict

Life movie will bring out pious horror from within. Calvin the antagonist is like a cockroach you can’t kill. The only difference being a cockroach isn’t on the prowl. Calvin is hunting and it is willing to do anything to suck life out of you for survival.

The way the movie ends it compels you to speculate which is a pretty great feeling. You can’t help but imagine what might happen next. It leaves threads open for sequels.

Life is a sci-fi thriller that shouldn’t be missed for the world.

Check out the trailer of Life movie here:

 

Criminal Review (2016)

Terrible waste of talent!

Okay, so the cast of the Criminal will blow your mind away. But was it all really needed when you were trying to cook an under-cooked meal? When you look at the screen time people have in the flick, known faces that try to earn a role with their popularity meter have measly dialogues to deliver, you can’t help feel sorry for them. I will name them one by one.

SPOILER CRIMINAL CHARACTERS

  1. Ryan Reynolds: Although Criminal tries to cash in on his name, he has the most laconic role ever. He disappears with a cameo. Budget issues? I get it that it was supposed to be the storyline. But really, you kill him that early? At least delve into the details!
  2. Scott Adkins: The guy can do so much. But all Vromen asked him to do was stand next to Oldman taking orders, listening to what’s next in the course like a normal guy. That was pretty much it! Did the director even know he could fight? Should have taken tips to include a fight scene at least?
  3. Michael Pitt: All he did was wait, smoke, wait more, react to some failure, eventually got shot.
  4. Antje Traue: She looked promising for a while as she slithered in that T-X kinda feel. But where does she end up? Under a bashed pot!
  5. Tommy Lee Jones: He appeared to the scene when he wanted to expound terse memory concepts, and to get ravaged by another ‘Old’Man fury.
  6. Amaury Nolasco: He was just there.
  7. Alice Eve: Was she even there?

Taking the spotlight to other actors now, those who could really act. Starting off with Kevin Costner. He still has it in him. You have to give it to him. Had this plot demanded more of him, I have no doubt he could deliver. Gal Gadot was simply good. Gary Oldman gets under the skin of his character so good that you cannot even poke him without getting gouged at. He is definitely good. Unfortunately none of them knew what ground they were in. It was a landslide, and they were dancing on it.

BETTER DIRECTOR FOR CRIMINAL?

I wish the concept of Criminal found a better director. Definitely not Ariel Vromen. There is no subtlety in him. It flung me into minutes of boredom and insouciance in the beginning itself that it was hard to concentrate. Good thing Costner did some crazy stuff to bring back the Mojo. Otherwise, it was simply falling down.

I say, this movie is criminal. It deprived us of our time, and plundered us of our money.

Deadpool Review (2016)

Deadpool is here! Finally on the big screen. Our favorite antihero bags himself a movie and it has something to do with Polverine 😉 Let the fandom erupt!

It walks closely on the scales of comics although focuses on his origins more. The Vanessa Carlysle story is chosen to go with him in order to pack in the romance quotient. Writers take it all the way through. Tim Miller chooses to go with an oscillating presentation where he tries to merge up the current and the past later connecting us to the stream midway. Deadpool occasionally breaks the fourth wall for emphasis, and it does manage to pack in his comic quotient.

Action seqs are jaw dropping as the protagonist rolls midair, does impressive flips whilst performing enthralling takedowns. Gore speaks volume with the rad Deadpool guns. Heads drop, bodies get spattered, bones break and faces get battered to pulp. It is all in there just how you would have imagined it to be.

At no point in the movie does the humour stop. It is on an incessant unchecked ride that has so many Marvel and DC references that would put you in laughter fits. Watch out for Green Lantern, X-Men and Wolverine references! So many quick snappy comebacks that have been aced by Ryan Reynolds nicely. The Merc with a mouth has a flair that relates to the cool perfectly.

Other characters in the movie are great as well. Portrayals of Dopinder and Weasel go with the comedy bandwagon complementing the hilarity just fine. Whilst Ed Skrein mixes style and perversion beautifully. Stan Lee makes a cameo as usual and a hilarious post-credit scene waits for you in the end as well. Don’t miss that one!

The big downside of the movie is its plot. It weighs low on it since most of the times Deadpool is busy entertaining us with his sarcastic unceasing one-liners. Also, Negasonic Teenage Warhead gets lost in the chatter, and fails to make an impact.

But we tend to overlook all of that since it was supposed to be an entertainer anyhow.
Oh wait! Before I almost forget: “Beeeeeeeeeeeep you, Indian Censor Board!” You ruined it for us.